What She's NOT Saying is Important
Read this story to learn what’s really going on in the minds of women and 5 steps to discover what she’s not saying and the path to success.
My husband and I talked with several financial advisor firms about some potential new business. All the financial professionals did a great job! They were respectful, helpful and went through the information thoroughly.
I had several lines of thought going on in my head, during these meetings. First, as a business coach to advisors, it was wonderful to see great professionals at work!
I was also spontaneously and naturally experiencing everything the studies on women investors report. Weird!
Let me share what’s going on in minds of women investors and the 5 Steps to Revealing the Secret Path to Success.
What's Really Going On in Her Mind & Why
Secret Thought: I don’t want to hold everyone hostage to all my questions. We need to spend no more than an hour. I don’t want to take up too much time.
Why Women Hesitate to Ask Questions in Mixed Groups
Secret Thought: Although my husband manages the details and leads publicly, it only looks like he is the primary decision maker. We make all your decisions together. The advisors don’t see that in action.
Why Women May Appear Less Influential (But NOT)
Secret Thought: I really wish I could take notes. How do I compare this with other things I’m hearing? How do I remember the important take-aways and decide? Wow! I’m glad I coach on the psychology being relevant & memorable.
Why Women May Take More Time to Decide
Secret Thought: I talk to advisors everyday, but even I think this technical jargon is confusing. Yuck!
Why Technical Jargon is a Turn-Off
Secret Thought: I can’t move forward until my questions are answered. I need to sort out this flood of information. But, I don’t want to be a pest and take too much time. I feel stuck!
Why Women Want & Need to Ask More Questions
5 Steps to Revealing the Secret Path to Success
These 5 steps will uncover what she’s not saying and how to move forward.
1: Ask What’s Most Important
Example: “I want to make sure your most important questions get answered. What do you want to discover during our time today?”
Positive Result: It uncovers the concerns & decision points for each person (couples or singles). Learn what is needed in order to move forward.
2: Normalize Different Decision-making Styles
Example: “Most people make decisions differently. Some make decisions quickly, others want more information and time to discuss. It’s important that you are fully comfortable. Don’t hesitate to ask for more time or answers. We’ll cover everything you want to know.”
Positive Result: Demonstrates that asking more questions will not annoy you. It’s normal. She does not have to be silent or defer to others. (which will stall her decision making)
3: Summarize Concretely
Example: “Now we’ve covered a lot of details. Let me summarize. I’ll show how this would impact you and help you sort out the decisions. You can take this home.”
Positive Result: Information needs context and meaning to be memorable. Summarize, visually and concretely. Show the practical impact. Write or draw it out. This will speed up the decision process.
4: Discover Next Steps to Decision
Example: “I want to understand & support your decision making process. What are your next steps in deciding?”
Positive Result: Shows respect for personal decision making. Offers help without being pushy or disengaged. Let’s you know the timing and steps. For couples, discover the process for each individual.
5: Anticipate & Offer More Conversations
Example: “It’s very common for questions to come up after we meet. I want to help as you sort through your options. When is a good time for me to check in and answer any more questions?”
Positive Result: Women rarely make a big decision in one meeting. They need time to sort, clarify and evaluate options. Normalize the back & forth, so she won’t feel like she’s “bothering you” with her evaluation process.
Then contact her, unless she says “don’t call me”. She’ll probably have more questions and feel awkward about taking your time, especially, if a partner/spouse decides faster.
Rinse & Repeat!